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12.08.20

‘On Saving Us Both’ single from Gary Llama

Today we are releasing a single from Gary Llama‘s upcoming record ‘Pathfinder’, titled ‘On Saving Us Both / Heart Emoji‘…

The single features the title track, as well as an acoustic version, AS WELL as an unreleased song, ‘Heart Emoji’.

Gary posted his thoughts on this song on his instagram

1. Value: It occurred to me one day, that each of us is always, at the present, at the farthest point in our journey in life. And with that, we put ourselves in these present situations, as victors, as well as survivors, of our past struggles. It popped in my head like this, ‘wow, she had to sit through like all of second grade, bullshit math tests, her teen years, 20s, 30s, and has decided that I’m worth being with’. That amazed me, that a human would work so hard at life, then choose to gift someone else with their time, with their heart. And for folks that have not had an easy road, be it health, addiction, trauma, it makes it that much more precious and valuable when the words ‘I love you’, come from them. So I put the highest value on that.

2. My Role: When you’ve loved enough folks, it becomes apparent that you may not really be ‘it’ for them: people grow, people change. And with that, you realize that, in the big picture, you may just be a temporary caretaker of their heart, helping them right now, on a path that may or may not include you in the long run. But if you truly love them, you sometimes have to step back, get past your own desires in the situation, and think ‘is this helping them in the long term? Is this helping them on THEIR path?’

When I named this single, ‘On Saving Us Both’, it wasn’t about some romantic idea of saving or something. It was really about preventing two folks, whom love the hell out of each other, from becoming victims to the idiosyncrasies of both themselves and the time they exist in, in relation to each other. Not bad things per se, but in the situation, difficult, perhaps, impossible, even, And with that, trying to evaluate how that will serve these two hearts in the long run.

There is nothing better than seeing someone you loved, thrive later in life, without you. It means you probably maybe did alright as a heart’s caretaker. Or maybe they are just really resilient. But the absolute worst thing, is thinking that someone you love, may not thrive, because of you. And fuck the hell out of that.

Dedicated to everone i have ever loved, i wish i could have understood this earlier. love to you all

The single is available now, streaming everywhere!

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